When you read Health Mind Power, you are reading personal development.
I don’t write self-help, because I don’t like “self-help” and I never have.
Self-help sounds weak and implies that the reader is broken and needs to be fixed.
All you have to do is read this book and all of your problems will be solved.
It also sounds very temporary. After all, you don’t want to rely on help forever do you?
Self-help books provide two things:
- A quick-fix to an imaginary problem (that you didn’t know existed until the author told you)
- A temporary change in emotional state that masks a long-term habit(s) that needs to be corrected
Self-help authors want you to rely on them. They’re like drug dealers.
Only they aren’t selling drugs.
Although, what they sell isn’t so different from a drug. Seeing as how drugs and self-help books target similar receptors in the brain that create positive emotional responses.
What I mean is, they want you to rely on them for help.
They want you to believe that they have the answers you need.
What they are selling is happiness, or really, just temporary happiness.
Self-help authors are gatekeepers for happiness.
On the other hand, personal development authors take a different approach.
They typically don’t guarantee anything and spend more time warning you of the tough road ahead.
Just the term “personal development” evokes a sense of personal responsibility for a long-term project.
Personal development authors aren’t selling a fix, they are selling a journey. They are sharing their ideas, experiences, and what they’ve seen work for most people.
It’s up to you to extract the information that is valuable in your life and ignore the rest.
Personal development authors are guides to fulfillment.
I say guide, because they are on the same path or journey – they just might be further ahead than you.
Personal development authors invite you to join them until you are ready to branch out on your own. They can be helpful, but they aren’t necessary.
There is a clear distinction between the two.
Happiness vs Fulfillment
Happiness and fulfillment are two separate experiences.
To help make the point more clear, here are the actual definitions from the dictionary:
- Happiness – a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to complete joy.
- Fulfillment – satisfaction or happiness as a result of fully developing one’s abilities or character; the achievement of something desired, promised, or predicted.
Happiness comes and goes. It is a mental state. Most importantly, happiness is a choice.
Creating a mental or emotional state of happiness is something that we should all be able to do, at any given time.
Fulfillment is permanent. Once you achieve something that fulfills you, it can never be taken away. Sure the temporary high of accomplishment will fade, but the fulfillment for what you have done is with you forever.
Muhammad Ali understood this, and that fact is reflected in one of his most famous quotes:
I hated every minute of training, but I said “Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.”
Ali experienced a lifetime of fulfillment from becoming a champion as a young man.
The catch is, fulfillment in one area of life doesn’t guarantee fulfillment in your life as a whole.
Or else, what would drive successful people to keep accomplishing more?
The Fallacy of “Never Being Satisfied”
I’ve been told throughout my life (mostly by ex-girlfriends) that I am impossible to satisfy.
As far as dating goes, it is possible to satisfy me – those girls just didn’t have what it takes. I know that, because I am fulfilled in my current relationship.
From my experience, the type of people who criticize you for never being satisfied are the same people who will hold you back from achieving that satisfaction.
This is a common theme among personal development writers, the idea of never being satisfied and always wanting to achieve more.
If you’ve read this site long enough you have seen that theme here as well.
While I think that you and the rest of my audience tends to relate to that idea, many people simply don’t.
The most common criticism is that you must be miserable if you are never satisfied.
Quite frankly, this couldn’t be further from the truth.
The feeling of never being satisfied and always wanting to achieve more shows that you respect yourself enough to demand more of yourself. It shows that you believe in yourself enough to dream a little bigger and that you have the balls (or ovaries) to take a swing at those dreams.
Never being satisfied makes me happy.
Because happiness and fulfillment are not mutually exclusive.
Those of us who are “never satisfied” are chasing more and more fulfillment in life.
And the pursuit itself makes us happy!
So when someone tries to put you down for never being satisfied, what they are really telling you is that they don’t understand the difference between happiness and fulfillment. They think that you have to have something to show for your happiness and you can’t just be happy at any given moment. They can’t fathom that you aren’t a slave to your emotions. And on top of that, it shows that they lack ambition.
Don’t let someone tell you that striving for more takes away from your current happiness. The truth is, it’s completely personal for each individual.
Just because they can’t have their cake and eat it too, doesn’t mean you should starve yourself if you can.
I created this website because I am chasing fulfillment in three major areas of life – health, mind, and power.
And I want to share my experiences with others and see them fulfilled as well.
My hunger for satisfaction will never cease until I am fulfilled in those three areas.
But make no mistake, I am happy. In the good times and the bad times, I am always happy.
I fucking love my life and I love myself. I wouldn’t trade spots with anyone.
You can call that narcissistic and I’m okay with that.
Because what kind of person doesn’t want you to love yourself?
Not a person I care to be around.
Until Next Time,
What do you think? Do you agree, disagree or have any thoughts to add? Let me know in the comments below.
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